19 Funny Birthday Cards

There are those people who get you a mushy, heartfelt birthday card…and then there’s these people.

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sebastien millon

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11 Responses to 19 Funny Birthday Cards

  1. E. says:

    I wish my parents thanked me for not doing heroine instead of always complaining about what I failure I am for graduating with honors in a different major that they wanted me to.

    • Lindsey says:

      A heroine is a female hero or protagonist. Heroin is a drug. The phrase, “…that they wanted me to” doesn’t make sense, and you are ending the phrase in a preposition. Exactly how did you graduate with honors?
      Oh, well, at least you didn’t do heroin(e).

      Sincerely,

      Not Your Parents

      • Orion says:

        BOOM!

      • Maggie I. says:

        LOL, Lindsey! You are my new heroine.

      • Anne says:

        Not everyone is native English. Surely you graduate with honors without speaking English perfectly.

      • brooke says:

        You can end a sentence with a preposition. That’s long been suspected to be an unfounded ‘rule’ which has creeped into the language, probably from when English was still not a ‘set’ language and some pompous jackass thought it seemed better, therefore causing confusion. You may also start a sentence with ‘But’ as well even though we all learned not to, it’s just guidelines so children don’t get stuck forming juvenille sentences. I’ve had English professors in the US and Britain react with surprise when I mentioned I had been taught to not end sentences with prepositions in elementary school.

      • Caio McCaioson says:

        Well, first off, it makes perfect sense unless you are an English undergrad who is pretending ignorance to look smart, which is a weird grammar nazi thing to do. Second, the “don’t end a sentence with a preposition” thing has rarely been strictly followed in English (it originally came from an attempt to apply Latin rules to English), and is generally considered extremely old fashion.

        Now, I used to know a few math professors who had terrible spelling and grammar but managed to get doctorates but I’m sure getting pHd in pure math isn’t nearly as difficult as getting BA in complaining about fictional novels.

      • Stewart says:

        So, how about this:
        “…graduating with honors in a different major that they wanted me to, a$$hat.”

      • Lola says:

        Actually, I gotta say the word “to” here is not a preposition. It’s a split infinitive. Like “to do.” He’s not ending a sentence with a preposition. He’s ending it with a split infinitive.

  2. bie. says:

    LOL… Bazinga dollar!

  3. Roy says:

    I loved the last card! It makes me wonder how many people look at Facebook to remember my birthday…

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